“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to a better understanding of ourselves.” -Carl Jung

Have you ever run into a situation or person(s) that just drives you absolutely cackling-crazy? Challenges such as that can be very frustrating at times – depending on how things are handled. Sometimes calling upon the witness inside of us to observe rather than judge during those times is a challenge unto itself! I find that when I am in a significant amount of pain, or very fatigued, my ability to “witness” can be very challenged. Therein lies the beauty of it – it affords me another opportunity for personal growth.

Personal growth – a phrase that is often bandied about glibly, with no real explanation as to what it means. I think it means different things to different people. For me, personal growth can look like a number of things – some large, some small. For example, after a particularly trying day at work in which a colleague derailed a meeting through lashing out in frustration, I learned that my reaction (one of unease and discomfort and brewing frustration) was linked not to that particular individual, but to my own past history with individuals who had such behaviour patterns. I was then able to fully witness my own internal messaging, and see the opportunity for growth within as a result in the form of rising above my own past hurts. I was also able to notice that the deeper my physical pain or fatigue, the more likely I am to have a lower emotional trigger threshold. Since it is very important for my health for me to remain calm, balance, and relaxed, this was a valuable insight into my own limits.

This week I have been in fairly physical high pain, due to remaining spinal instability fall-out from my last seizure episode in March. The pain leads to very high fatigue, and lack of strong mental focus. So the challenge for me is to recognize that I am still healing from the seizures, and that my body is still adapting to whatever physical changes were incurred. The growth part comes from my ability to be compassionate with myself, and give my body the rest it needs without cursing it in frustration for what I cannot do at any particular moment!

“Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know.” -Pema Chodron

(Now if I could only do something about this ridiculously and continuously rainy weather on the east coast – the frustration of frizzy poofy hair is making people crazy!!)

Namaste
Carolyne

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