The scariest moment is always just before you start. ~ Stephen King

This spring and summer I will be facing some fears, adjusting to changes, and pushing my own limits. I decided it was time – because I was noticing that I was falling into a fear-based place that I was increasingly uncomfortable with.

The persistent one was about getting on a bicycle again for the first time in years. Not scary for most of us, right? For me – it came about due to my inability to drive anymore due to my seizures, and the docs’ recommendations to stay on quiet streets if I decide to get on a bike again. Not being able to drive any more has often left me feeling somewhat trapped – and that was exacerbated in recent weeks when our local transit service went on strike for a number of weeks. So, recently, when I reached a breaking point of “trapped-ness” I bought a bike  that I found on sale at a local store. I decided it only made sense to ride it back home, especially since I was contemplating joining an MS Bike team at work.

What a fiasco! I more or less walked my new pretty bike home with spurts of riding it…with periods of breathing that sounded like I was coughing up a cow!! Bikes have really changed since I was last on one, and just getting used to the gearing was a challenge. But I made it home…and promptly collapsed on the couch – marvelling that I had not killed myself! My butt was aching and sore – so apparently all those years of biking in high school and university didn’t “keep”! Go figure, eh? And muscles that I forgot I even had were screaming at me. But I loved the rush of success. I did it – maybe not stellarly – but I did it. And the success of it has stuck – so I committed to riding with the MS Bike tour team at work. (Oy – this should be too funny over the next weeks as I “train”…I’ll bring my camera!)

The experience reminded me of a lesson I learned long ago: Feel the fear, and do it anyway!

So I am committing myself to a number of fundraising challenges this spring and summer, including the MS walk and MS Bike tour, as well as a couple of others (like the Blue Nose Walk/Run with the team at All Yoga .)

“Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.”T.S. Eliot

Namaste

Carolyne

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