Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. ~ Thomas Jefferson

Image Source: http://www.halifaxtrails.ca/index_files/FlemingPark.htm
Dingle Tower Image Source: http://www.halifaxtrails.ca/index_files/FlemingPark.htm

As many of you know, I manage my MS by maintaining a strong exercise program – which includes swimming, walking, and yoga. This daily exercise routine is necessary to manage my fatigue and pain levels. Too much lying around causes my leg pain to skyrocket, and makes me more fatigued and less mobile. Two days of inactivity can cause painful immobility – and I really don’t like it, so hence I maintain as high a level of physical activity as possible. Luckily, my earlier years as a synchronized swimmer, lifeguard team member, waterpolo player and weight training enthusiast have given me a “push through the pain” discipline and mentality that serves me well now when I need it for my own survival.

Even so, MS remains confusing to manage and pisses me off sometimes (ok – lots of times).  I can push myself very hard while swimming and maintain amazing cardio benefits as a result. I can do hot yoga and regulate my breathing and maintain flexibility. But push myself a bit hard on a warm sunny day? …that’s another story all together. Hubby and I hiked around the Dingle Tower park here in Halifax recently on a beautiful sunny summer day, then we climbed to the top of the historic tower. It is just a few stories high…straight up wrought iron stairways. No problem, right? I mean – I am fit, and have cardio benefits to burn, right? Well, I get to the top…and the world starts to go grey at the edges and I feel myself about to faint…so I drop immediately and spend 15 minutes on the floor to prevent a full-on faint. All this brought on by being overheated and my MS flaring up, saying: “Nope – don’t like it. I am gonna take you down.”

It made me angry to feel weak and vulnerable. It made me angry to feel “bested” by my own body – despite all my efforts to maintain a good balance. So – that stubborn streak came out yet again. Because I recognized what was happening, I was abe to prevent a full-on faint by resting at the top of the tower, allowing the breezes to cool me rapidly. Once I felt cooler and stronger, I got back up – and I climbed down those stairs on my own, shaky legs and all. And lucky hubby – he did not have to carry me down the tower stairs! Though he chivalrously walked in front of me so he could catch me if I fell. (That man is wonderful – and so patient with my stubbornness! )

To me – it is that “push through the pain” mentality that allows me to push the boundaries of my own body like that – beyond my MS; beyond my fear of having a seizure. I don’t like feeling held back – and I will try to do whatever I can to succeed at my goal. Do I always succeed? Heck, no – we all know that by now. But to me, trying is the most important part – it means I am alive and moving forward. Sheer stubbornness helps too!

Respect your efforts, respect yourself. Self-respect leads to self-discipline. When you have both firmly under your belt, that’s real power. ~ Clint Eastwood

Namaste

Carolyne

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